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Saturday, 21 January 2017


Can kill with one finger
In the left-hand corner, unarmed combat expert, 'Nasty Nikko' Holgate, our Town Clerk.....aided and abetted by 'BabyFace' Rocky Mellen
Heavy man the right-hand corner, 'SuperSumo' Suresh Gupta

Very shortly, the Dame will be revealing all about a vicious battle between 'Nasty Nikko' and the formidable, self-proclaimed philanthropist, 'SuperSumo Suresh' the 40 stone 'leisure entrepreneur'.
'Nasty Nikko' has been running the Council for a few years so why only now has he dared take on 'SuperSumo Suresh'?
It reminds the Dame of the recent story of the man in the Norfolk hospital. He had been squatting in a hospital bed for two years, despite being fit to leave within days of entering the hospital. It has taken the hospital two years to decide to go to court and evict the man.
These government employees need to buck their ideas up.

Sunday, 15 January 2017


Dearest Dame

Earls Court residents pay towards hanging baskets to be hung from lampposts. Sadly, since the Summer they have not been replaced and the lamp posts remain bare into the New Year.
When the council has been called residents are told that the hanging baskets have not been replaced due to “health and safety”.
Dame, this naughty fib has caused guffaws of laughter.
Philbeach Gardens, home to 'Lord' Pooter Cockell and Cllr 'Hello Sailor' Spalding, seems unaffected by 'ealth n' safety' since the Gardens are not just abundant with gorgeous hanging baskets but fairy lights too!
More curious still is the question as to who paid to make Philbeach Gardens a riot of colour and light.
Was it the Council or Sailor Spalding's mates at CapCo?
Maybe Cllr Spalding can shed some light on this.....
As ever

Commander, the Hon. B*****y  P*****s, RN rtd

Friday, 13 January 2017


Old Court House
You live within a mile of The Old Court House, Walton Street? 
Then be very frightened!

David Graham, the bachelor billionaire Canadian owner of this 10,000 sq. ft plus mansion has decided that he needs even more square footage.

One of his gofers has written a greasy letter to neighbours telling them he plans to dig out a massive basement.

This will house a gymnasium; a media room (?) a replacement swimming pool and yet another kitchen(3 in total!) and storage.

So, Dave, what happened to the ballroom that you were obsessing about last time round? Are you no longer putting yourself up for Strictly Come Dancing?

The Dame is going to be blunt. Dave used to be married to that ghastly witch, Barbara Amiel. She then latched on to fellow Canadian, the unpleasant crook ‘Lord' Black. 
Lady Grim
Had Dave still been married to this ‘monstress’  we could appreciate she needed the extra storage space for her fabulous shoe collection-reputed to be several thousand pairs strong.....

......Dave is a near eighty-year-old singleton. For tax reasons he spends just ninety days a year in London; the rest of the year at one of his several other homes dotted around the world.
So why does he need to make neighbours' lives hell for two years when he has ample space within the existing 12 bedroom 'mansion'?
Money Lover
The answer? Money. 
It will cost £400 per sq. to do the digging adding a further £3,000 per sq.ft when he sells the building on. 
So, if he adds another several thousand sq.ft the arithmetic is obvious

His letter, addressed ‘Dear Neighbour’, was not even signed by this self-important and self-interested man: someone he calls his ‘colleague’, a Mark Brown did the signing.

In his letter, Graham gives the impression RBKC officers are somehow supporting his application and have agreed that the vast number of construction lorries can travel down Walton Street and then into Pont Street.
Cleverly, Graham forgets to mention that the lorries will also go thundering down an already congested Beauchamp Place or on down Pont Street and into Sloane Street.
Beauchamp Place
Graham Rat Run

This will be a massively disruptive project for thousands of residents.
It will also coincide with the demolition of the Police Station in Walton Street with yet more construction lorries.

The chaos will create hellish conditions for residents and businesses for the foreseeable future.
Beauchamp Place will be hit very hard.

Mr Graham, you have all the space you need. Your proposal is un-neighbourly and unwanted.
It will be fought tooth and nail and your suave blandishments count for nothing.
Oh, and by the way, Graham’s tightfistedness is shown here. He lists the major shareholders of Cablecast as himself, at 99.1%, and his oppo, Neil Bambrough, with 0.1%....
Mean sod!

Thursday, 5 January 2017


The Council of The Chelsea Society has elected Dr. James Thompson to be its new Chairman, following the retirement of Mr. Damian Greenish.  
The new Chairman took office at the end of the Society’s AGM on 21st November 2016.
James is an Honorary senior lecturer in psychology at London University, and has lived in Chelsea since 1982. He has been a member of The Chelsea Society since 1983.
He was drawn to Chelsea by the architecture, individual shops, mews houses, bohemian crowds, music, history, river views along the Embankment, and the exciting mix of cultural past and vivid quirky present. 
Within a year of moving to Chelsea he opposed a major planning application in his street, and since then has been Chairman of his local Residents’ Association in the streets between the Physic Garden and the Royal Hospital.
In 2006 James led the “Save Sloane Square campaign, and since 2011 has chaired the King’s Road Association of Chelsea Residents (KRACR) – campaigning particularly against large basement developments. 
He will retire from that Chairmanship in February 2017.
James holds membership card no. 20 at the Chelsea Physic Garden, and would have had an even lower number if he had responded more promptly to the first-ever membership application, hand-delivered by the Garden Curator to nearby streets in 1983.
James taught psychology and held clinics at the Middlesex Hospital Medical School, later University College London Medical School. His first job was as a researcher on brain-damaged children.  
He was clinical psychologist at Guy’s Hospital Medical School, and later at the Institute of Psychiatry.  He continues to publish academic papers.
He was depicted as a character in a play at the Royal Court, as a psychologist explaining the motivations of terrorists!
As Chairman of the Society, James, like other Chairmen before him, will not be a member of the Society’s Planning Committee.

Monday, 2 January 2017


The Dame was especially pleased to receive this from Sad Badger, an ardent follower with many a bristly comment.
This happy shot seems to have been taken outside the Orangery, Holland Park after a Christmas scavenge 

Our dearest Dame
All the very best in 2017 to you and your rascal nephew...
hope to read more and more of your discoveries and comments in this, what will no doubt be an eventful year.

cheerio and love from us all
Sad Badger and my sette

Oh, Cantabs....give it a rest. We know you have lots. I expect you wear your gown and mortar board down the pump, just to ensure the world knows you're a brainbox.


The Dame wishes all her dear readers peace and happiness in the year ahead. 
Yes, even to those who hope a horrid accident befalls her....

Those unkind souls will be unhappy to note over 30,000 page views a month attest to the ever-growing popularity of her musings....

Wednesday, 28 December 2016


Not long ago the Dame reported that Cllr Palmer amused himself during vital debates by playing games on his smartphone or checking his miserable penny share portfolio.
Palmer checks portfolio
during vital debate
It seems he is not alone in the abuse of council equipment. Here's Cllr Vernon-Jackson, the former Lib Dem leader of Portsmouth City Council playing with himself during a major debate on cuts. Read it HERE
His smartphone, like that of Palmer's, was paid for by taxpayers.

Playing Solitaire


Our great city is awash with curious stories about interesting people. The Dame is in one of her reminiscing moods so thought this little vignette would interest readers. 

Not long ago the Dame was having her 1960 Mercedes Benz sports car serviced. 
The Dame in better days
Whilst her loyal chauffeur was attended to the technical details the Dame enjoyed a chat with the garage owner, a delightful and amusing Indian gentleman.
Anyway, in course of conversation the Dame’s amusing raconteur
said, “ Dame, do you realise you are talking to the last man ever to see Albert Speer alive?”
The Dame, puzzled, asked how it was that a ‘garagiste’ would have known the awful Herr Speer.

“Well, Dame, it was like this. At one point in my life, before the motor trade, I was a junior doctor at St Mary’s Paddington. I remember that day in early September 1981 so clearly.....
I was the only A&E  doctor on duty when Speer was wheeled in suffering from a brain clot.  He was in London to be interviewed by the BBC.

All I remember of Speer was the anger as he fought death: not a nice man".